Nerdy Boy Web Log: Earth Date: December 13, 2005

Dear Readers,

Would you like me to tell you the story of how I got my cat? Too bad I'm telling it anyway.

It was a bright Chicago morning, but it wasn't bright where I lived. I was driving to work (my comic book/Star War and Star Trek Memorobilia/iguana heat lamp stoe) when suddenly something zipped across the road in front of me. I pulled over to see what it was, and there hiding in the bushes was a little kitty. I picked him up and put him in my car. I took it back to my house, and gave it some milk. I decided to name him Mittens. Mother was out jazzercising. I knew I could not keep him because mother is allergic to cats, but I still wanted to love him. A few hours later mother came home and I quickly hid Mittens. Mother sat down on the couch, where Mittens was sitting, to watch Dr. Phil. Suddenly she started an outburst of sneezing. "I must be allergic to something," she said.
"Is that cat hair on your hands!"
"No mother, I swear it isn't," I replied.
"Timothy L. Finkleshwartz, bring me the cat you are hiding."
I knew mother would be to smart for me.
I brought her Mittens. She was about to take him out the house, when suddenly she saw a gleam in his eyes. She started to cry. OK, I guess you can keep him, she said.
I was overjoyed. Mother now has to take her allergy medicine a little more often, but it's worth it with Mittens around.
A few days after I had a found Mittens, a young boy came to the door, asking about his lost cat. He showed me a picture of his cat. That was Mittens all right. Me and Mittens had bonded so closesly, and I couldn't give him to this boy who probably whipped Mittens with his jewel encrusted whip. I told him no, I haven't seen your cat. And ever since then Mittens has been my special little friend. He's a great listner, and he's good at keeping away the scary mice. I've had Mittens for five years now, and he's the best (and only) friend I've ever had.

Trivia: Owls are the only birds who can see the color blue.

Joke:
Q: What do you call an eleven foot long urine stain?
A: Line dancing at the retirement center

Q: What do you call a vegetarian with the runs?
A: Salad Shooter

Q: Why does Helen Keller have yellow legs?
A: Because her dog is blind too.