Nerdy Boy Web Log: Earth Date: December 12, 2005

Dearest Readers,

I just got back from the hospital last night. I asked one of the nurses for a date but she rejected me, of course.

A big thank you to my evil half brother, who wrote for me while I was gone. On Thursday night mother had me shoveling snow, and I slipped on some ice and fell. I'm going to need to be in a brace for the next week. On Friday, mother and I leave for our cruise to the Caribbean.

I asked Santa for a mule for Christmas. Mother sent my letter yesterday. I know Santa isn't real. I wonder what happens to all the letters the post office gets addressed to Santa. They probably burn them or something. If I do get a mule for Christmas, I'm going to name him Smiggens.

My half brother is in jail right now. Last night, I was sleeping peacefully in my race car bed, when I heard something and woke up, but then thought it was nothing so I went back to sleep. A minute later, a hear something again, open my eyes and I see my brother breathing over me with a butter knife. I know it's just a butter knife, but he could poke my eye out with it. I screamed and ran into mommy's room. Mother called the police, and they arrested him. I slept under mother's bed with a baseball bat that night.

Today I had a cheese sandwich for lunch that was cheeserific!

Thanks for reading, gotta go.

Trivia: Eating 11 pounds of apples will make you gain one pound of weight.

Joke:
Q: How did the scientist solve the problem of constipation?
A: He worked it out with a pencil.

Q: What's the difference between a truck-load of babies and a truck-load of ball-bearings?
A: You can't unload a truck-load of ball-bearings with a pitch-fork.